Well, we've done it! We've managed to do what some thought was impossible – blending two distinct design styles into one cohesive home. Before I reveal the final result, I thought it would be fun (and insightful!) to share the process that Nic and I followed to make this work.
So, if you and your spouse are finding yourselves at odds over the perfect home design, this blog is for you! I'm diving into my top three tips for negotiating and styling a home that truly reflects both your personalities and needs. Lucky for us, our kids don't have strong opinions yet – they’re still in the “lovebird” stage and only insist on sharing a bedroom. That’s been a game-changer for us, allowing extra space to host guests and, of course, strengthening the sibling bond.
Now, back to the design challenge – in my last blog, I shared how Nic and I wandered the aisles of retail stores, each of us wincing at the other’s picks. It was clear our styles couldn’t be more different! This week, I’m sharing the three key tips that helped us bridge the gap.
Tip #1: Appreciation, Not Judgement
Let’s start with the golden rule – nothing kills a conversation (or a marriage!) faster than feeling judged instead of heard. This was a real struggle for me. As a creative and an interior designer, I had to check myself when I found myself thinking, “Did he forget who studied interior design and actually runs a design company?” I’m not saying I’m a control freak... okay, maybe just a little. But in the interest of keeping my marriage intact, I swallowed my pride and started listening. And you know what? It worked.
Pinterest became our secret weapon. I learned to appreciate Nic’s love for clean lines and contemporary styles, even though, deep down, I was wondering how on earth I could live with a glass dining table (spoiler: it's not easy, that thing is always dirty with the kids fingure prints). But when I shifted my perspective and thought about what those design choices meant to him, I saw the beauty in them.
And yes, hanging vintage art was something Nic had to wrap his head around – especially since it reminded him of his grandmother’s house. No offense to her (she was wonderful), but he definitely didn’t want our home to give off those "granny vibes." Still, understanding the sentimental value behind my love for vintage pieces helped him appreciate the stories they told – and that made all the difference.
Tip #2: Find the Core of What the Other Cares About
It’s all too easy to get caught up in the surface-level details of design choices, but more often than not, it’s not really about the thing itself – it’s about what that thing symbolizes. When you can uncover the deeper meaning behind your spouse’s preferences, you’ll find a way to blend your styles without compromising on what matters most to each of you.
Take, for example, my vintage art dilemma. My love for vintage pieces stemmed from the nostalgia and memories they bring – a warmth and personal connection that I cherish. Nic, however, wasn’t a fan. While I wasn’t willing to give up on my vintage art entirely, I quickly realized that it wasn’t the art itself Nic didn’t like – it was the overall vibe. So, instead of pushing my vintage collection on him, I found a way to work around it. I swapped out some of the older pieces for modern artwork, but I made sure to keep the frames that Nic didn’t mind – the clean lines that fit his contemporary style. The beauty in that shift? It respected my love for the vintage look while bringing in Nic’s desire for a sleeker, more modern aesthetic.
It’s all about finding that core principle that’s important to the other person. For instance, if one of you loves mid-century modern and the other prefers rustic farmhouse, think about what each style represents. Mid-century modern is often about minimalism and clean lines, while rustic farmhouse tends to be about warmth, comfort, and family. If you can find the common thread between those, it’s easy to blend them in a way that feels cohesive and personal.
In our case, this led to the creation of a stunning, unique art wall in our dining room. We mixed modern, abstract pieces with vintage-inspired frames to create a look that is fresh, contemporary, and meaningful. The end result was a visually striking design that felt completely “us” – no grandma vibes in sight!
Tip #3: Create Design Zones - Let Each Style Shine in Its Own Space
Sometimes, blending two different design styles means finding a way for both to coexist in a way that feels balanced. One of the best ways we navigated this was by creating distinct “zones” in our home where each style could shine in its own right – while still maintaining harmony.
Take our entryway, for example. It was by far the easiest and quickest space to style. It beautifully combines both of our design tastes, with modern, clean lines paired with vintage touches. The result? A welcoming and functional entry that feels like the perfect marriage of both our preferences.
Then, there’s the dining room, which ended up being mostly influenced by Nic’s love for modern, sleek design. But we didn’t leave my style behind – we made sure to add a combined art wall, which is a fresh, creative blend of his contemporary taste and my vintage love. This space reflects both of our personalities in a way that feels cohesive yet unique.
Now, the living room? Well, that's all me. I embraced my love for organic, cozy elements – think natural materials, soft textures, and a laid-back atmosphere. But it’s not all my style. For example, we added black and white sconces to bring in a touch of Nic’s modern and minimalist taste. These sleek, elegant sconces balance out the warmth of the space and create a visually striking contrast without compromising on the cozy, organic feel I wanted.
The key takeaway here is that when you find ways to balance both styles by creating different zones or areas, you can each have your design identity without sacrificing what you love. And when those spaces come together, they create a home that feels truly reflective of both your personalities.
Conclusion: A Home That’s Truly Ours
Blending two distinct design styles into one harmonious home isn’t always easy, but with the right approach, it’s entirely possible – and, dare I say, even fun! From appreciating each other’s tastes to finding creative compromises, we’ve managed to make our differences work in ways that truly reflect both of our personalities. By creating designated zones where each style shines, and embracing the beauty of collaboration, we’ve crafted a space that feels balanced, authentic, and so us.
Stay tuned, because the big reveal is just around the corner! We can't wait to share the final transformation with you – and we hope that, through our journey, you’re inspired to embrace your own design blend, no matter how different your tastes may seem. After all, a home is made up of the people who live in it, and the design should reflect that beautifully.
If you're in South Africa, we're excited to let you know that we're now taking on new clients! Whether you're looking for a complete home makeover or a specific design project, we’re ready to bring your vision to life. Visit this link to learn more about our services. And for those outside South Africa, our DigitallyStyled services are available to help you elevate your space, no matter where you are.
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